


When are you going to stop pretending that everything’s fine?

by renegadeartist



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-16
Updated: 2014-07-16
Packaged: 2018-02-09 02:29:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1965540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/renegadeartist/pseuds/renegadeartist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He smiled at her, getting up off the bed. “It’s fine. Goodnight, Tex.” He walked to the open door, slipping back into the hall. Before he closed it, though, he looked back in the room and said one last thing. “And if you ever need someone to talk to I’m just down the hall.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	When are you going to stop pretending that everything’s fine?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MistyMoon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MistyMoon/gifts).



He hadn’t been able to sleep. There were too many attributing factors to list, but for one the Mother of Invention was never silent. While he had grown up in a household that was constantly filled with noise and shouting and people fawning over him and his sister the nights were always silent. If he cared to, he could always sit by the window and listen to the radio that his sister always had playing. The music was always quiet and distorted, but it was something to listen to when he had a sleepless night. He seemed to be having those more often since his admission to Freelancer. The quiet drone of the Mother of Invention’s engine was enough to calm him to sleep again but it wasn’t his sister’s trashy taste of music.

 

Back home he faced his own problems head on and got over them. His sister would always come to him, burying herself in the blankets with him and falling asleep there. Eventually she stopped doing that, though. She learned to face her own problems eventually. But it usually consisted of her yelling and punching something, mostly him. South had become distant in the prior years but every so often he felt her sit on the end of his bed in the middle of the night. She never said anything and he didn’t either. She just sat there and he pretended to sleep.

 

If nothing else it gave him a strong sense of people’s emotions. He could tell when someone was feeling terrible and if he tried hard enough he could always calm them down. It was an amazing gift to have when Theta woke up in the middle of the night and started crying or yelling or just sitting there, waiting for him to get up and comfort him. He thought it was Theta when he heard the crying.

 

“Theta? Buddy? Are you alright?” He squinted into the darkness, looking for the familiar purple glow that was his AI. When he only saw the glow of the clock on his bedside table he was noticeably confused. The time was 2 am and his little companion was nowhere to be seen. But he could still hear crying. And it didn’t sound like Theta.

 

“North? Did you need me?” He jumped at the sudden noise, swinging his gaze towards the AI looking at him curiously.

 

“No, no, sorry. It’s just… can you hear that, Theta?”

 

He looked confused for a moment-if an AI with no actual face to speak of could look confused- but he nodded. “It sounds like Agent Texas.”

 

“Tex…? Why would she be-?” He wasn’t sure why he was surprised. It was just… it seemed like Tex was above things like crying, like she didn’t have her own problems. That was just stupid, though. Of course she must have problems, everyone did. It was just… weird. “I’m going to go see her.”

 

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Theta asked, nervous.

 

“Yeah, it’ll be fine. Just… go back to sleep, Theta.”

 

“Alright…” he said reluctantly.

 

The small form of the AI flickered out and he slowly crept out of his room, not wanting anyone else to hear him. The floor was cold and the hallway was empty and dark. He could hear the scientists and engineers perpetually working on the lower decks, making it hard to hear the noises from down the hall. He found his way to Tex’s room and knocked on the door. When she didn’t open the door he went in anyways.

 

Her room was simple and bare. The lights weren’t off and the glow from her lamp crept out into the hallway. Somehow the light didn’t help make her room any brighter. She hadn’t customized the room in any way besides her armor in a neat pile in the corner and her signature black helmet kicked as far away from her as possible. The woman herself was sitting on her bed, legs tucked up to her chest and her arms wrapped around herself.

 

He wondered briefly what happened. “Hey, Tex…” when she didn’t answer he started walking towards her. “Are you… alright?” He tried, inching closer to her bed, eventually sitting down next to her. Even then she didn’t respond. He stared at her, trying to figure out what to do next. If it was his sister he would just sit there and wait for her to start talking. He wasn’t sure if the same plan would work for Tex, though.

 

Apparently it did, because she looked up briefly and immediately sat up. Somehow she hadn’t realized he was there. That sent up at least ten red flags in his mind. “O-oh. North. It’s just you,” she muttered. It sounded like she was trying to convince herself of that.

 

“Yeah, it’s just me. And Theta, but he’s asleep.”

 

She looked confused. “Theta?”

 

“My AI,” he said in explanation. Her face transformed from mild confusion to understanding. She rested her head in her hands and stared at him, probably trying to tell him to leave. “Tex… is there something wrong?”

 

“No.” She looked at him for a second. “…yeah.”

 

“What is it?”

 

She let out a heavy sigh. “It’s complicated.”

 

He tucked his feet underneath him and faced her. “I’ve got all night if you need it.”

 

She was silent for a while. It took so long that North had almost fallen asleep by the time she started talking. "You know when something happens in your life and you eventually forget about it but not really? Then some day down the road it pops up again or you're reminded of it and suddenly the pain is just as bad as the day is happened?" She didn't wait for North to respond. “I knew someone once. Her name was Alison and she was an amazing person. She was always there even if I can’t remember her all that well.” North stayed silent and he listened to her, being her outlet for any emotions she needed to get rid of. “But one day she just disappeared. I don’t remember when but she did but one day the house was one person emptier and I couldn’t hear her laugh from across the hall, laughing at something someone said. I asked around and found out she had been drafted. I held onto the hope that one day she would come back but…” it was there that she stopped talking, her voice cracking and her eyes downcast.

 

“She never did.” He finished for her. She nodded, biting her lip so hard he swore that he saw blood. “Hey, hey, there’s no need for that.” He reached over and cupped her face with his hands. Her eyes were bloodshot and wet.

 

“S-sorry. It’s just- I just- I can’t just pretend that everything’s _fine._ And… I don’t know… I just miss her, y’know?”

 

“Yeah. I had a sister once. You know her. South,” at Tex’s nod he continued. “She’s still here, obviously, but she doesn’t talk to me anymore. She’s not the kid that refused to grow up anymore. She’s the girl that grew up without her own consent. She likes to pretend that she’s better than coming to her brother for support. Someday I’m going to be without her, and I know that. I just hope that she stops thinking she needs to be indipendant to prove that she's worth anything before that. Aaaand I’m rambling about myself. Sorry.”

 

“No, it’s fine.” She looked better. Her eyes were clear and her voice wasn’t cracking anymore. Maybe all she needed was to talk it out. “Sorry I woke you. It’s just… sometimes my AI brings back unwanted memories.”

 

He smiled at her, getting up off the bed. “It’s fine. Goodnight, Tex.” He walked to the open door, slipping back into the hall. Before he closed it, though, he looked back in the room and said one last thing. “And if you ever need someone to talk to I’m just down the hall.”


End file.
